Nihilists Have More Fun

Some would say that, when I realized I could no longer believe in God, I lost my faith. I even used this phrasing to explain my changed views to others once or twice, but something about it never struck me quite right, and after thinking it over a bit, I realized why these words had seemed ill-fitted to the situation. It was because all my life I had heard the word "faith" used in two different ways without realizing it, and while I had given up on something that is called faith in certain circumstances, I hadn't stopped exercising the thing that is more broadly referred to as faith at all. You see, I had gone a very long time without realizing that people were calling two different, and in fact contradictory, concepts by the same name. Now, I don't want to give the impression here that it's somehow wrong, bad, or incorrect for a word to have contradictory usages. The meanings of words tend to shift over time—that's simply how language works—and sometimes pe...

- originally October 27, 2019 I've been gone for quite a while already. I took a break to fall in love. And also to write a book. The book is probably three quarters of the way done with a good outline to go off of for the rest, and I'm more in love everyday with the man who's certainly better than my dreams. I've been spending my free time on writing that is not this, so it's been a bit longer than I hoped before I've managed to get a second post out, but at least it's still the same year, and that's not too bad given my record! I could say a lot of things about love. That shouldn't be surprising given that out of the pie of things people say, a wide slice has to do with love. But it is a little surprising to me to find myself having things to say on the subject. I was never one to think ahead much to what it would be like to fall in love. Never the kind of girl who daydreamed about the perfect wedding. (And believe me, I am feeling that n...

- originally March 27, 2019 Oh my god, I'm on a blog. What am I doing here? How did I get here? I've tried to start a blog numerous times in the past. All attempts have failed. Perhaps this time will be different. Only time will tell. Perhaps I'll eventually run out of things to talk about and abandon this one as well. Perhaps not. I do think it's safe to say this blog won't end for the same reason the last one did. I really had a pretty good thing going on last time. The theme wasn't too restrictive. I came up with something somewhat interesting to write about every couple months or so. But I got distracted by an in-depth piece of writing on a religious topic that at the time was very important to me. I started to write so much about it that I decided to make a little website of it with sections for all the subtopics. As the writing time stretched into the months I kept thinking that when I was done with this site I could just go back to the blog, post ...